Tales from the Tigerfort

Well, I had one last night, anyway. Some time into it, I suddenly realised that:

a) I was dreaming,
b) the dream would make a really good story, and
c) I would have a hard time getting the dialogue right.

At this point, I persuaded the people I was talking to to put the dream on hold while I went and found a suitable tape deck to record the rest of the dream with. Sadly, I failed to wake up clutching the cassette, and thus have only my slightly vague memories of the conversations in the dream to work from.