tigerfort | State of [strike]decay[/strike] de fort (Reply)

Honestly not a huge amount has changed over the last ~9 months[0]. I'm so, so tired of feeling like a useless lump of meat[1].

It's reasonably indicative of my ability to do things that I've managed to write individual replies to exactly none of those who left kind and helpful comments on last August's wall of text, despite really wanting to do so. I love you all, thank you again, and sorry for being useless. (I have no idea how I'm managing to get so much typed here; I would say it was auto-distraction from trying to psych myself up to ring the doctor, but I've been trying to do that for weeks, so [bemused shrug emoji].)

I keep meaning to make some kind of list of the main fundamental problems, and our basic options in terms of "where do we go[3] from here?"

OK, typing this lot so far has taken about an hour, and I really need to lie down with my eyes shut for a bit before my brain overheats any further.

[0] barring my ongoing physical deterioration, I guess.
[1] this is partly, but by no means entirely, a "benefit" of living under our current terrifying kleptocracy, capitalism more generally, and what I can't help feeling is a pretty grim outlook for the future overall. But the increasing amount of time that my physical and mental limits force me to spend doing nothing at all is exhausting[2].

[2] of course the reason I have to do nothing is that doing anything is also exhausting, just in a different way (or several different ways, depending on the something).
[3] literally physically go; I don't see a way to make staying in Torquay viablewithout divine, magical, or sufficiently-advanced-technology intervention

It helps if I don't absentmindedly put the /cut tag immediately after the cut, doesn't it.